it's all just too much

I'm so tired. I'm tired to my very bones. I have even thought perhaps I should go see a doctor and find out what is the matter........why am I soooo tired. But I know. I know the reasons. I can list them off

1. too much weight

2. work

3. going to school

4. running from one sporting event to another for Eric, Murray and my stepson

5. worry about my step son who is in a "time out house"

6. the ever present booming sound of my biological clock ticking

7. my sleep apnea is killing me

8. welcome back to the evening and middle of the night panic attacks

9. the pressure of being a wife and mother and all those titles bring with them

10.the grief the grief the grief

I could sit here and list at least 20 more reasons but those are the biggies. I am so tired and it's making me thin skinned (not thin of course, just thin skinned which sucks), grouchy, edgy and judgmental. I am not enjoying this version of me.

Something has to give.